heart to heart

there are too many people to see, too many people to apologise to for negligence, too many people i want to know. but where to find the time, between running from place to place, and 1 degree eating my life next week, there are too many people i need to catch up with– and properly catch up with, not just a chat in the afternoon but a deeper (re-)connection to reclaim. and suddenly i miss the old days, so so much, as much as i don’t want them to return. there are too many things i left unsaid to all of you– and i will never get a chance to say them to you.

too many missed opportunities, too many wasted silences. i would have wanted to know you so, so much better, but the time slid by and we moved too far apart for the distance to ever be overcome. yet now when the old and the new criss cross again and again, there is the same old yearning for a connection, for a relationship solid and tangible in sms and conversations, and lasting. but what to do? if one heart cries out for a connection, but the other is firmly shut, or if both are open but no base, no common foundations exist. sometimes 2 bridges are built simultaneously side-by-side, rather than stemming the chasm, and there is nothing to do but to placidly lean over and flail and weep.

i want to get to know you my better, my friend. i can only hope and wish you felt that same yearning to reach over and stretch– and possibly hopefully touch to make contact, ineffable but solid, solid and undeniable.

(i fear, sometimes, we may never get that chance.)

update

oh pepper, i totally missed the goose geese!

—

in the meantime, i realised i haven’t blogged at all ever since landing!

yes, i am in singapore, and yes, i am dying. DYING. of the humidity. and it’s been nary a week since i’ve got back, and already things have been happening in my life, getting involved with 1 degree asia, watching movies like cars, superman returns, eating b&j’s in singapore (twice), eating la mian xiao long bao (twice), eating gelatissimo (once), trying to catch geese (and possibly missing along the way), tea, coffee and talk talk talk. and there’s still more to come– world cup, comm meeting, pirates of the carribean, thank you for smoking, going back to hwa chong, 1 degree asia outreach and logistics work– arrrrgh!

on the other hand, some things never do change. and i’m glad of that. :) -muacks to friends-

—

and now– shameless plug time! i’m working for 1 degree asia, that’s a 5-day (25-29 July) convention about social issues and activism. Participating orgs are all very illustrious, oxfam, UNDP, UNEP, MCYS, world bank… etc etc. and there will also be delegates from all over the world, including the middle east and the other ASEAN countries. and it’ll be a really good experience if y’all could take part in it (if you’re interested). the website is http://www.onedegreeasia.org for more information, cost, programme, speakers, etc. and if you have school then– because you’ll be taking part representing your uni, they’ll let you take leave lar. hahahaha. many schools are participating already. even if you’re not interested in commiting for 5-days, you could consider a day-pass that is $60 per day, and attend only on the days that you’re interested.

i honestly, think it’ll be a good experience. :)

whee!